Exciting event of the evening

It's been a long time since I let off any real steam. BUT!!! Tonight I got the fun of doing it. Supposedly, Mom let some moron run his dogs on our property. I didn't know about it and even though I do now - I don't care.

Anyway, Jeff and I were headed for the pond to watch the sunset when I looked up and saw some idiot standing on the dam and two beagles running amuck. That ticked me off. So, it was back to the house, lock up Jeff, grab my gun and go after them.

Eventually they out ran me back to my yard and cut back up the hill. The chase was on. I fired! Missed. Fired again and there was silence. Dang!!! I thought I had reloaded my pistol and I hadn't. Bad time to figure that one out. So, I went after his owner. Said owner didn't know I had a pistol pointed at him. (evil happy smug grin without commas)

I gave him my drill sargent voice and told him to get his damn dogs off my property.

Idiot: "Is that a gun?"

Me: "Yes, and you won't be the first person I've shot at, now get your damn dogs off my property."

Idiot: "Do you know who I am?"

ME: "No and I don't care. Get your dogs off my property or I'll shoot them."

Turns out it was the local game warden. ROFL!!! I kept my gun on him the whole time. If he'd only known there wasn't a single shot left. ROFL!!!

That was the most fun I've had in a long time. I got to shoot at the game wardens stupid hunting dogs. Chase his stupid hunting dogs with my staff. Pull a gun on the game warden. Cuss him out. Threaten his life. Threaten his dogs life! And end victorious having scared the crap out of him.

Nothing quite like a deranged female with an empty weapon! ROFL!

Life! It doesn't get much better than that. ROFL!!!

PS: Game warden was so upset he called my mom to complain. ROFL!!! Sissy.

Evil beasts from hell

I looked out the kitchen window this morning and there was a massive dog and a not so massive dog staring back at me. The big dog was literally the size of a pony (maybe taller) and the other was about half his size.

Out came my slingshot! Unfortunately, the sweatpants I had on didn't have pockets, so I wasn't able to keep the onslaught of rocks flying. The evil mongrels caught on. So I ran in the house and pulled out my 22 pistol!

By the time I got out, the shorter varmint was running full speed down the field and the other was half way up the hill. I fired in the air to scare him off. It worked. He ran for his life.

Meanwhile, I went about the yard yelling for the cats, while looking like a stupid redneck with my holster hanging from my belt.

B"H, my cats are fine. Everyone had run for the trees. I'm hoping the stupid mongrels will cross the road and pester the neighbours. The neighbours will shoot them. :]